Someone in the past

sent me a message through my cyworld today. Eunjoo ya, can you guess who it is? It's OIL!!!:O

Good day or bad day?

This morning John and I participated in a video meeting with the people at the headquarters. The meeting was about how to report effectively the improvements implemented on the sample that was sent to U company after the first sample failed to get their approval. I am really bad at concentrating and especially in video meetings, it's much more difficult for me. At EnE, I even fell asleep in a meeting once and the president got angry and went out of the room.:) However, it was very important for me to concentrate during the meeting this morning because I had to make the report reflecting everybody's opinion by myself since Frank wasn't there. In the middle of the meeting, Mr. Dong, the director asked me about something and I only heard him calling my name but not what was said before my name. I was perplexed and remained quiet for a few seconds but he just kept talking. Whew~ How good it is that I am still young and not expected to know about everything! After that, they discussed the report I made and sent them via email. All of a sudden, everybody started saying my name to present their opinions about the report I made. "In the report Lee Kyounghye si made, ...", "Lee Kyounghye si summarized...", "Like Lee kyounghye si wrote,..." It felt weird but good at the same time. My attention level just surged up and I felt the sense of responsibility. Yes, it was an interesting feeling. Obviously people pay more attention when their names are called.

About ten minutes before it became 6pm, Changjoon started to ask people if they could go for drinking after work. Actually I was going to buy a birthday cake for my brother-in-law and go to my sister's place after work but my sister said she had some relatives coming to celebrate his bitrthday so I decided to go another time. Changjoon came up to me and said "We are going out for drinking. Why don't you come?". I said "It's my brother-in-law's birthday today so I...". Even before I finished, he went back to his desk. I felt really bad about him even though I was lying. He looked very disappointed but I didn't understand why he got so disappointed. We are not even close and I don't think they really need me to join them. He said "Is your brother-in-law more important than me?" Ha!!! He asked me if I have met his Chinese wife who is even younger than me (Changjoon is 36 or something and a typical ajossi.). I said no. Maybe he wanted to show his young and allegedly pretty wife to me. But as I said, we are not that close and I am not really interested in his wife although I am curious about a Chinese wife living in Korea. After that, Kurt asked me again if I would join them. How annoying!! I knew they went out for drinking last night. And tonight again. I really feel sorry for their families. If my husband was like that, that would be horrible. No, I wouldn't pick such a man for my husband. If they had asked me a few days in advance or even a day in advance, I could have considered it although I don't want to. They have no idea how to respect personal time. Why do I have to act like I am sorry for not being available for them?? This is awful, really. These moments make me hate Korea.
I came home via Homeplus. I bought some chocolate chip cookies and grapes. The grocery section was filled with all sorts of chocolates for the SAT tomorrow. It lightens me up just looking at them.:) I saw some green grapes next to the purple ones but they are simply too expensive. It made me miss the seedless grapes in Australia that I loved as well as mangoes.
I came home and ate some vanila-cream cookies, chocolate chip cookies and an apple. It seemed my appetite had gone down since I was sick last month but recently my craving for sweet food has been activated again. I should look good for the exhibition.:(
Coughing continues. Cold medicines don't seem to work. Please go away.

Something that can't be explained logically

Although I can see clearly what is good and what is bad for me, I choose the hard way hoping that it is not a bad decision just because my mind leads me to it.

Complaints and suspicions

It's already time to go to sleep but I don't want to. Tonight Heejeong called me and said she is feeling too bored without working. And Songi just called me and told me the same thing. How could I not understand both of them? I know exactly how boring life without a job is from my experience in Australia. It is beyond boredom, it can cause absolute depression.
Like I predicted, we went to a sashimi restaurant tonight for work dinner.:( Outback Steakhouse was attracting me just across the road. I ate a few pieces of raw fish just because there was nothing to eat. At least raw fish is good for skin. But I don't like the texture and smell of raw fish and the idea of eating raw stuff is awful. Mr. Kim smoked constantly and Kevin talked constantly as always. I was glad that I didn't have to go for the second round to karaoke because not everyone was going. John has been very nice to me these days, which is strange to me. Today he came over to my desk and asked me if he could use my eyeglasses wiping cloth. It definitely made me feel suspicious of his real intention because his desk is pretty far away from mine and he is not that close to me enough to come over for such a petty reason. Tonight at the restaurant, I heard him saying "Kyounghye-si doesn't eat raw fish. Then what does she eat here?". Last Monday he even said several times that I looked attractive that night. I don't think I've done something nice to him and suddenly he started being nice to me. I can't help but think to myself that there must be something behind it...
Songi wants to meet me tomorrow after I finish work. I told her that I would prefer to meet during the weekend but she insisted meeting tomorrow and I kind of agreed. Maybe I should cancel the arrangement tomorrow so she could understand how it feels.:)
I am getting used to this keyboard. That's good.
Inyoung and Gina's boyfriends came and pick them up tonight. I felt lonley and walked home doing some self-pitying thinking.
I am feeling much better now thanks to my laptop. Gotta sleep.

Laptop

Part of the reasons I wanted to buy a laptop was to study at home. But it has been very hard and almost impossible although what I am doing now is kind of English writing practice.:) I didn't tell anyone at work that I bought a laptop although I asked Frank if he was satisfied with his Vaio before. I know if they knew I had a laptop, they would expect me to do some extra work or deal with urgent inquires during the weekends. I almost told Sunny about it but I succeeded in keeping it to myself. Whew...hope I don't make any Freudian slip later.:)
Having a laptop is wonderful. It makes me concentrate on work in the office because I can do personal stuff at home. And I don't have to go to smokey PC bangs and touch the dirty key boards. Also, I don't have to go to my sister's place and be interrupted by Taewon. I can do on-line shopping when I am too tired to go shopping. But actually it's a bit tiring and hurts my eyes to do on-line shopping so I don't enjoy it much. I bought a sweat suit for mom on the net the other day and she said she likes it so I am happy, too. By the way, maybe I should get the cable uninstalled because I haven't watched much TV since I bought this laptop. But I still wanna watch Sex and the city on TV although I watched the whole episodes from the season 1 to 6. Also, I want to watch CEO exchange, Apprentice, Beauty and the Geek, America's next top model, American Idol and Tonight's show with Jay Leno. Watching Jay Leno show gives me an insight about Amercian humor and culture. He often makes jokes about Kim Jung-il but interestingly they are not funny to me. Is it because I don't understand his English?? There are a lot of jokes about sex on the show that are definitely prohibited on Korean TV. They are funny to me because I don't have trouble understanding such jokes and the English. hahaha

Tomorrow night, I HAVE TO go to work dinner. There are two PhDs from Seogang Univ. who will be working on Prosonic's confidential ultrasound system development project in our office for a month or so. Maybe Frank wants us to meet them. I guess tomorrow's work dinner will not lead to crazy drinking since MEDICA is just a few days away. Anyway, I hope not. The aftermath of crazy drinking always affects my state of mind for a few days.

I am gonna skip breakfast tomorrow morning to eat dinner. No more raw fish, please! I am the only who don't eat raw fish in the office so most of the time, my preference for food is not respected at all. I didn't used to eat even a piece of it but I started eating some a few months ago because I am labled as a picky and fancy eater to them, which is not exactly true and I don't want to be judged like that. I am always willing to sacrifice for everyone else but don't understand why they wanna make me eat it.

Ok, I wanna lie down and watch Sex and the city and go to sleep.
It is so good that I can keep a diary like Carrie does on her Apple laptop on Sex and the city.hehehe